Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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