she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
