well you can't waste a boner
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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