I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize