What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize