There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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