Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
