Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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