do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
