hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
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