I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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