She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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