Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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