so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
