sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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