Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
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If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
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For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
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