Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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