TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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