Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
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I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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