Its about making memories worth repressing
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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