So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Life is so much better after having sex.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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