Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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