Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
