I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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