He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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