question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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