Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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