don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
i believe in u and ur pee
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
