1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Drunk is not a location!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
