oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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