but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
