Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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