question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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