The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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