I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
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You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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