And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
