hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Yo dont text me then not text me
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
She bit a glass in half.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
