"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
