I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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