sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize