My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
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