i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
i think im in europe. pls send help