If that was your dad, he is hot
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
