At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
