i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
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