Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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