69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
