i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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