If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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