Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
