I hate all girls vehemently.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize