I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
